Is it just me? Didn't think so.
This past Saturday my cat of 11 years went out to explore and so far she hasn't come home. She's an indoor/outdoor cat and goes out almost daily to check out where the wild things are. But she always comes home. Except this time she hasn't come back (so far).
It's really upset me. I am in tears. I miss having her around and know her daily routine as well as I know my own. I love my companion animals as I love any person in my life. I felt waves of grief and overwhelm come over me. The worst part of her being gone is not knowing what happened to her, if she's okay and if she'll ever come back. As much as my heart hurts for her, I'm reminded once again about how impermanent life is. That no one we love belongs to us. We're always in flux.
Having to say goodbye without actually knowing if it's time for goodbye. Or the worst is having to say goodbye when you don't want to say goodbye.